The mandatory 72-hour hold was coming to an end. Had it been three days? It felt like I had lived in this hospital for months.
Read more about my experience in a mental facility here.
It is amazing what clarity can result from spending three days cut off from the world. I had conducted a life review while stuck between those stale cinderblock walls.
And it wasn't pretty.
I saw thirty years of sleepwalking. Making decisions based on what I thought everyone else wanted. An entire life disconnected from my authentic self.
Walking out of the hospital I looked up at the sky and declared to myself: "I will never end up like this again."
The following day, I bought a small black notebook. Something inside me said that documenting my thoughts would help me avoid another hospital stay. I decided that I wanted to live. Not only live but live on purpose.
That black book has turned into stacks of important data. That data has helped cultivate the nature of my subconscious. Understanding my subconscious enabled me to come out of the depression cycle. And ultimately, helped me get sober from crystal meth.
Almost every thought leader advises journaling.
But no one tells you how.
Until now:
Any addict who has been to rehab or sought out support has heard:
~~Journaling is a must~~
How many times have purchased a notebook for journaling and filled 1 or 2 pages? Yeah, I was there too:
Thought cycles.
Behavioral patterns.
Emotional ebbs and flows.
Journaling introduced personal tracking mechanisms; I became a student of myself.
And guess what?
Leveraging my journal healed my clinical depression and eventually aided in sobriety from crystal meth.
Here's my basic formula:
Divider Line.
I like to draw a line to create a margin for the sections. I also use this space for big ideas or epiphanies that I want to notice when I review later.
Date.
Seems obvious, right? Well, ya never know.
It is vitally important to note the date of each entry. And I make sure to use a new page each day. This allows for easy data access for monthly tracking.
Cycle Day.
After some time, specific addiction cycles will arise out of the journal pages. Everyone, addict or not, has a cycle- just like seasons- that operates subliminally in their life. A time span of creation-flourish-harvest-death.
I've pinpointed 3 100-day cycles throughout the year where the climatic ending is relapse. Not necessarily drugs. Relapses emotionally, mentally, physically, etc.
Emotional Rating.
I created a 1-5 rating to gauge my emotional state. Use colors, symbols, whatever. If necessary, include in your journal entry the reasoning behind the rating.
The ratings are valuable data for monthly tracking and tying emotions to events, holidays, seasons, etc. The more you know about yourself, the better.
Yesterday.
Create a summary of your previous journal entry. Update progress, get reminded of goals, and recalibrate past epiphanies.
I forget what I wrote in 24 hours. The refresher keeps it all top of mind.
Today.
Set a timer and begin a stream-of-consciousness brain dump. Put pen to paper and don't lift the pen until the timer sounds.
No correcting yourself, changing what you wrote, or "starting over".
Mantra.
Some may prefer "Affirmation" but I feel that term is overused and misunderstood. I create a mantra based on Today's entry. This is a sentence that creates a theme and is repeated in my mind.
I text the mantra to myself so that it stays in my awareness. Make it simple and easy to repeat.
Monthly Tracking.
I place my ratings in a straight line and go back to the lowest and highest trends to remind myself what I wrote during those times.
For the low points, I pinpoint common thought patterns, sentences, and tones of writing to watch for those moving forward. Same for the high points.
I place all of my mantras in a list as well. This helps me get a feel for where I am spiritually and mentally.
Notating common themes allows me to see where I could focus for the next month.
This is the method that works for me. I recommend using my ideas to stimulate your journaling technique that works best.
The bottom line here is becoming intimately aware of your subconscious patterns to take control of your life. If you aren't in control, the conditioning of your life, the auto-pilot, will dictate the path.
If you'd like to work with me one-on-one, schedule your free session here.
Love you! đź’šDallas
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